Reed Says . . . August 2014 Edition

This last month has been all about potty training. Reed is still in diapers but often goes full days without having an accident. He just isn't very good at telling us when he needs to go yet. He will go when put on the toilet every 1.5-2 hours but since that is completely dependent on me or whoever is watching him we haven't moved him to underwear. While spending time in the bathroom can be exhausting (especially when you add in a 9 month old), we have found one thing Reed and I both like to do to kill time - learning jokes. You have to admit there is nothing cuter than a three year old telling a joke! His favorite goes "what do you call a skeleton that won't get out of bed? Lazy Bones!" Okay, okay, here are some Reed originals:

I was nursing Kieran when I heard some crashing and thrashing in Reed's room. When I went in to investigate I found his blinds all turned and twisted and he was singing "bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do?"

One day while killing time in the bathroom I decided to quiz Reed by asking him which leg was his right and which was his left. He got both correct and then pointing down he said "and that's my penis leg."

Reed has decided that when only air (no loud sound) comes out it's called a "fancy toot."

A few Sundays back we were driving to Pepe and Nonna's and Reed was singing wee, wee, wee, wee, over and over again. It was beyond annoying and I muttered something along the lines of "we need to be there already!" He returned with " a couple more wees and then we'll be to Nonna's house Mom."

He was once again on the toilet the other day when he told me that "it hurts when I poop because sometimes I poop and the chunk splashes my pee back onto my penis." I was trying not to let him see me laughing so I put my face in my hands. To this he responded with "Mom, don't be sad I'm okay."

The boys were playing in the living room when Kieran actually got the etch-a-sketch writing implement and made a mark on the screen. Reed started yelling "Mom look, Kieran's drawing!" Then he turned to K and told him "I'm impressed with you!!!"

At the dinner table Reed was recounting to Jon what he had been up to during the day. He volunteered that "Dad today when I went potty I ate Star Wars gummies. Yoda is green, that's convenient."

Out of nowhere Reed ran up to me and told me that "Kieran and Soft Sheep are my two favorite babies!" (I'm not sure which one should feel more flattered).

Jon was helping The Monkey use the bathroom but his aim was a bit off and he ended up peeing a bit on the personalized step stool that is against the toilet. When Jon started cleaning up the mess Reed leaned over and told him "don't worry Dad, the R (the stool says Reed) doesn't have pee on it."

Reed is often times resistant to the idea of walking Dodger in the morning. One morning when I was putting his tennis shoes on He told me that his "nose doesn't want to walk Dodger it wants to go home. Mom, I do not wish to be outside."

I was snacking on tortilla chips before dinner and Reed asked if he could have some. I said yes and then he told me "thank you Mom, these will help my hungriness go away."

The boys and I were eating lunch when Reed suddenly fell out of his chair and landed with a thud on the floor. I stood up and peered over the table to see the damage - he was laying flat on his back and as soon as he saw me he started to sing "hit the road jack."